In the bible, the Tower of Babel was a project by humanity to build a tower tall enough to reach heaven. When God observed their tower, he made it so everyone working on the tower spoke different languages, halting the work and scattering them across the world. If there is a better analogy for describing the landscape when two people separate, I’ve yet to hear it.
Two people invest huge amounts of time, money and emotion into building their own tower, a family. When it ends, these people who once we’re on the same wavelength can’t seem to “get” each other. What was once a personality quirk becomes cause for concern, their lifestyle during the marriage now a point for criticism.
It’s even more pronounced when the people separating are from different cultures. “I’m not Greek, so why should I take the kids to Greek school during my time?” I think that in these sorts of cases, one cannot help but associate their own hurt with the culture of the person who hurt them. They want to reject everything about that person. Once this happens, they might as well be speaking in different languages.
I suppose that makes us lawyers the interpreters, buffering the emotional conflict and helping people navigate through the hurt to understand what is truly important in the end. Because you can’t rebuild your life over ruins.